La Lune

I once built a ladder to the moon

To deposit my heartbreak among the stars

I gathered the slivers, the shards and dust

Then piled it there on the moon to rust

Next to a flagpole that never was

Under the brilliance of a blazing sun

November

Waltzing,

On the edge of midnight 

Under a razor moon

A silver trail of tears,

Slicing through 

My aching heart

Swaying, 

On the edge of tomorrow

Under a razor moon

Toe-to-toe--hardly breathing, 

Rocking to the pace of

Your beating heart 

Sobbing,

On the edge of a high tide 

Under a razor moon

Salty sea comes crashing in,

Searing the wounds of

Two heavy hearts

Eroding, 

On the edge of a new dawn

Under the blazing sun

The tincture of Time erasing,

The bitter sting of

A heart's deepest scars

Except for this--

The single splinter from

Two salt soaked hearts,

Once torn apart

Under the edge of a razor moon

Amsterdam

All my late night rendezvous 

Have since been eclipsed

By stable days and nights with you.

You save me from the spiders in my shoes,

And when storm clouds start grumbling, I save you.

And I know that this sounds cheesy--

But I don't care. I don't care!

Because I happen to know you fucking love cheese.

And for you babe, 

I'll be the best cheese.

I'll be thy holy Swiss cheese,

I'll be your buttered Brie.

And when we've aged 50 years? 

Well then babe, 

I'll be your goddamn Gouda.

At least, that's what I want to be

 If you'll let me.

I want to be the finest cheese your tongue has ever tasted.

So lay your wine-stained lips on me; 

Let's see how we pair. 

Boulder and Snow

I watch you 

Standing tall against the fresh, pink sun. 

Rough, loved edges

Cracked, dry and thirsty. 

Just down the hill 

And I can almost feel you.

The searing sun slides over my ivory blanket 

Tugging at the seams

Still, I watch.

And then,

A drop of water joins another…  

Joins another… 

Joins another…

The slightest temptation of a trickle 

Glides across your ancient skin.

You breathe a heavy sigh

As I kiss your jagged jaw.

The sun soars higher  

Warming me more 

The swelter makes me shift my shoulders 

Melting away my dress like snow

The trickle has grown to a stream, 

Steadily moving down your obstinate body 

Filling each old scratch and crumble

Soothing, and healing and making anew

The sun soars higher still 

I pull and roll and shout until 

I finally give in…

I am now a roaring river!

Pushing, flowing,

Caressing and hugging,

Clashing, surging, 

Cascading then kissing

Your sweet, rugged edges 

Smoothly become weathered 

With the persuasive power of 

My passionate love.

But my power has only so much time 

And life does not grant me endless bounty. 

The tides burn up and fade

As day becomes a violaceous gray

The last part of me clings to you

Then giving in it sighs goodbye.

I turn away and accept my fate, 

Flowing home to my ocean.

"Until next spring..."

Desert Flower

Red, barren, cracked and dry
Death makes a daily appearance
On scorching waves of desert sky
Life, like water is sparse and shy

Out of the clay one dares take a risk
Through fractured floor a foreigner arrives

The Empty Echo

You gaze into a lifeless thing 

To judge your own complexion 

But don't you know by now? 

A mirror only shows imperfection

You stress about the way you look

'til it becomes an obsession

What's wrong with who you are?
 Self loathing just leads to depression

The tempered glass is filled with flaws 

Concealed from your detection

Why believe what you see? 

The reflection hides your perfection

What Surrounds Us

The universe is immersed in revolution. Not the type of revolution spoken of in history books, although that also might be true. No, the universe is immersed in revolving objects of all forms. Objects with orbits revolving around other objects in orbit. Infinite orbitals.

Our sun is at the pinnacle of the solar system where we exist. All of the planets, including our own, revolve around this celestial star. This star, our sun, also revolves around something greater. On a more local scale, our mother planet, Earth, also has an orbit whereas the moon finds itself in eternal rotation. On a microscopic level, even the atoms that compose us and all things, have orbits their own. Objects with orbits revolving around other objects in orbit... infinite orbitals.

It is not surprising then to realize that we humans are also objects of orbit, with orbits of our own. Each of us have orbitals. We have orbits revolving around us where we store the pieces of ourselves we choose to ignore. We have orbits revolving around us where we store the pieces of ourselves we cannot yet embrace. 

When you put something into one of your orbits, your must understand that it does not leave you; it's still there revolving around you like clockwork. If you put that part of you out there, if you ignore it, it does not go away. It's still a part of you, revolving around until you choose to make peace with it.

It's okay to have orbits, we all do. Just realize that when you have too many pieces of yourself orbiting around, things get a little hazy. Your vision is obscured by a cloud of things you refuse to accept. A cloud of things your refuse to embrace. How can you see clearly through the smog of all the things about yourself you chose to reject? 

When you live in a shroud of orbits, you experience life in a darker hue. 

If you're living inside a dark cloud, understand that it doesn't have to be that way. 

You are the commander that decides which parts of yourself get launched into orbit. 

You are also the one that decides which parts of yourself you're ready to reclaim. 

That's the beauty of it. That's the silver lining. 

You're in control of the revolutions around you. 

You're in control of your own revolution. 

So, what are you waiting for?

Carpe Diem

True Friends

Reflections of happiness, funny comradery.
Friendship built on smiles and jokes.
My true companion, my bosom friend.
 Swearing by the stars that we are separated only by death.

I feel a sharp pain in my side and start to fall downward
I turn to you my ally, my rock, my strength.
You step away. I'm so confused.
I reach out for you, gasping for kindness.
Your numb eyes watch me fall.
Watch me scratch, pull, heave and beg.
You turn away without a second glance.
Leaving me battered, bleeding and raw.
Short breathes are ragged.
I am alone with my untimed heartbeat.
Alone with my scars.
Time passes.
I've stood again. Stronger this time.
Time passes.
There's a resolution in my brow.
New strength and knowledge are here.
And then all at once you are back.
A small, silly thing.
I don't even recognize you at first.
But you haven't changed at all.

Whimsical hair as bright as the sun.
Moon eyes that have never known pain.
You fair weathered friend. You sweet darling scoundrel.
What makes you think I need you again?

Reflections Distorted

Today, the sky is an ashen hue of grey.
Today, the sky is void of warmth.
Today, Christmas is a week away.
Today, the sky is weeping.

I stand in line at the checkout stand.
Two older women wait in front of me.
My ears tune-in to their conversation.
They're talking about Connecticut.

*"They say he took his mother's life..."
"...went to the school and took the lives of 20 children..."
"...he went in and they said they heard popping sounds..."
"...Anyways, they say she was probably the first child to be shot..."*

And there it was.
Good old American sentiment at it's finest.
Does it really matter who's innocent life was taken first?
Does it really matter?

So petty.
So insignificant.
Here we are, facing a tragedy... and then,
Here we are turning it into a competition.

Frustration hits me like a wave, as I stand there in line.
My stomach twists because it's always the same.
My head swirls as I feel the earth spinning
It's always the same.

The sky still sobs as I leave the store.
The haze still haunts and the cold confirms.
I get in my car to drive away from the women.
I get in my car to drive away from the twisted sentiment.

Now I am standing alone in the rain.
The callous wind nips at my neck.
I stare at the rippling surface of the lake.
I watch the reflecting sky distort itself.

Somewhere out there people are suffering.
Around the world humans die every day.
But when it's here, the world morns with us,
And when it's out there, we pretend not to know.

Desert Desserts

I know a secret.

Come close & I will tell you.
Come close & I will whisper it in your ear.

The desert is full of desserts. 

Look up & you will see!
Look up!

Bubblegum sunsets embrace the horizon
As clouds of cotton candy sweeten the sky
Dark chocolate syrup soaks through blue slowly
And sugary stars start to sprinkle the night

The desert if full of desserts,
But no body knows it.

No body knows it,
Except for you.
Except for me.

The Man Between Pleasure & Pain

You hate him until you see him again.

You hated yourself before his scars.

Comes and goes out your back door.

Drinking gin and driving fast cars.

Cigarette smoke on satin lips.

Carries a knife with a cross etched in.

Back handed compliments meant for you.

Wanton desires are merely a sin.

Studded leather jacket on a clean, white shirt.

Too cool to know who the fuck you are.

He'll draw blood but suck out the venom,

And make you shudder in the back of his car.

Pain and pleasure tango before you.

A dance too familiar to the beat of your heart.

The sugar is sticky and someone is bleeding.

When he drives away, you fall apart.

Inhale

Dim the lights

Ignite the spark

Float on the wind

Glow in the dark

Dance past the thoughts

Sail through the fate

Inhale the love

Exhale the hate

Dancing With Demons

I'm not a dancer, but I know this dance

Perfect rotations around each other

Perfectly rounded yet opposite

Opposing forces locked in a rhythm

Gazing eyes locked in a trance

Carefully spinning around in spirals

Together we dance the sinner's dance

Recovery

Scars healing correctly require patience on my part.

The sun is beaming on my back, frost is on my heart.

Like a bud through fresh new earth, I am starting o're.

With the help of other roots, I'll grow strong once more.

What I See

Eyes

Sapphire circles

Piercing stunning captivating 

An open gateway to your soul 

Windows

Παράλειψη σχεδιασμού

Silver drops of dew splash down

Personal perceptions rule what I see

An immortal moon clutched in my hands

Blindly I sail through an ambiguous sea

Stars were invented by mechanical men

Are memories any more real than dreams?

Presently, nothing's more real than right now

But what we know now is not what it seems

The Observation

I know it's not very polite,
But I stared at you as you walked by
Your head hung low with hollow eyes

I noticed--

As you walked you dropped your tears
They glistened on the cobble stones
Breadcrumbs to a broken heart

I noticed.

The Assigment

The Assignment is to write an essay about yourself.

I have to write a poem about myself? Easy. Who knows me better than me?

Let's see here....

There was a butterfly newly broken from the cocoon.

A butterfly? Seriously? How old am I, seven? Pull it together. I can do this, it will be easy.

The lion's mane had a wild, fierce beauty that petrified and relieved.

"That petrified and relieved." What the hell am I even talking about now? I'm just going to stay away from animals in this poem...

Come on, think, think!

Nobody knew that the doll was the forgotten dreamer, the past-tense friend.

Wow, why don't I just slit my wrists open and bleed on the paper, that would be just as emo as that line.

Why can't I think?? It's just a poem about me, why is this proving so difficult?

Every cascading  crescendo corresponds to the cleverly crystallized concept.

I don't even have any idea what that begins to mean.... I should probably stay away from the alliteration as well. No animals, no alliteration, I can do this. Right?

You have uneven lumps in the wrong place. Your too-small-eyes make your poorly-placed makeup even worse.

Okay so looking into a mirror isn't helping the creative process. Side note: Fix eyeshadow when I am done with this poem. Back to the poem. Focus. Just add some poetic words and call it good.

Her eyes were the ever-changing-grey that perceived everything in super color. Her heart-on-fire shot sparks to the night stars.

This is just getting worse and worse. I give up. I'm just keeping it simple. I have no more energy to try.

I'll just do it like this...

I am Samara. 
I'm the girl with crazy-curly hair that is sometimes too cautious.
I eat when I'm bored and have occasional insomnia.
My face smiles more than my heart does and I try really hard to be happy.
I'm nothing too special, but I'm better than I think. I really am.
Sometimes I want to give up but I never do. Because I'm a fighter.
I try to work out enough and I go to bed really early sometimes.
I have really bony fingers and a very kind heart.
I am Samara.

A s y m m e t r i c a l

Together we lay here counting the stars

Because the stars are uncountable & we know

The seasons are changing so we go along for the ride

Constantly spinning with the world; we are recycled

Fabricated lines stitched together with a touch of symmetry

We swallow the sparks inside our eyes & force our fears to fade

The more you suffer, the more it means you really care.

Calling cards left at my door are starting to rot.
Everyone knows that I don't give them a thought.
A sort of black diamond print covers these walls,
But something completely different is outside these halls.
I hear a wind-chime out in the breeze
I also hear her starting to wheeze.
Springtime, why can't you? Oh please just be gone.
But then summer will be here, I won't have any fun.
Each season a new onset of attacks and moans
Our doctor must constantly be at his phone.
Resentment is a feeling I just won't ever feel.
Though my new dress is dusty along with my heels.
Painstaking love shows it's marks with the scars.
But I am here focused, I catch glimpse of the stars.

Will somebody just take me away from here?

Sun Worshipper

I'm clinging to rust pulsing rock.

My hands clutch into wise sandstone.

One would think that there would be a pain,

But the rich rock mixes with my blood,

And heals this body with a sunshine kiss.

The Copper Gods smile down on me,

and paint my skin ancient design. 

I kneel down on crimson sandstone.

Happily submitting to the warmth,

I  am a slave to the russet man.

The cerulean sky makes me brave.

I've been cut away from the marble,

And sent down to bronze-sun-worshipers. 

Who knew the Coral Cliffs would cause,

this flaxen soul to invigorate?

A Familiar Sting

Oh! Ouch! That really stung!

Let's lock lips and loosen that tongue

It's been a while since I've felt your touch

Gotta make it count, I've missed this too much

Amour! Amour! Let's win this war

Dawn your armor and get ready for more

Hearts beating fast--that familiar blood rush

We close our eyes then embrace with a hush

Ambrosia

In this world you live asleep like the dead

Distorted dream through a prism unclean

The colors your see are not what they seem

How can you see with your eyes wide shut?

Kiss the demons at their feet

Praise them for their artful lies

Let them lull you back to sleep

Singing sweet dark lullabies

In mundo vivunt, somno velut mortui

A deformato per somnium inmundum carcer

See your colores non sunt quod videntur 

Quomodo clausis oculis vestris wide? 

Osculamini pedes eorum daemonum 

Laus eorum est artificiosa 

Ipsi vos ad somnum otium 

Cantus dulcis tenebris lullabies

The Attic

Boxed up memories collect dust in the attic 

Concealed in the corner behind shattered glass

Reflections of people seen through hazy static 

Remember the reason you chose to forget

Piñata

Smashed to pieces; torn and tattered  
Spill my guts out on the floor
Beaten, broken, bruised, and battered 
Tape me up to take some more

The Spaces Between

This sober sky is a bleak reminder of the mistakes I made

I spread my wings, flew away and left you on the ground

Well flying leads to falling through the spaces in between,

I screamed away the pain and now I'm dancing in the clouds

But somewhere out there you still exist -- outside my mind you still exist

And somewhere out there you're still breathing-- your lungs still drink the air 

Monochrome

k

(Written & formatted by Christian J. Clark. 2012)

Haiku

Orange snakes disappear

Into the blackest of ink.

The fire grows bigger.

Substance

They say that sin is how you get in
Who knew it would be my escape?
I'll shed this skin and leave it behind
I'm coming home to claim my fate

I'm not a failure if I fail to quit
Hidden deep behind the veil
Vapor vexed in winter winds
Ignorance is a chosen cell

It's easy getting into Hell
Getting out's a different story
I have my ticket, I'm leaving now
I'm coming home to claim my glory

Fearing shadows we face the sun
Torrential rain drops build the flood
You can't erase these burning feelings
These veins do flow with ink, not blood

Flirting With Fire

And we Angels run through hell,
For the excitement of the fires lapping at our wings.
Skipping though the cinders and the shrieks,
A light breeze blowing our cream silk robes.

The hot sting rings familiar with each lick and whip,
As the fire's tongues whisper sweet nothings.
But we run without breathing,
Smiles reflecting burning earth warm our faces.

Dancing demoralized demons,
Set the tune for a waltz around the ashes.
Mephistopheles is the king of the ball,
But don't dance too close, keep a bible in between.

Lucifer is a handsome man,
To twist the looks of any mortal.
To pull and break the vows of even us,
Until we submerge into our lust.

But now we curve and slip away,
Through the cackling jungles to greater climbs.
And we Angels run through hell,
For the excitement of the fires lapping at our wings.

Mountain Callers

Appleseed casts of misfit conclusions
Take their count and sing their dues.
Confusing melodies of chronic opiates
Call out the maker of velvet shoes.

***

Nobody look to the drummer, our brother
And we will give sweets to all that hear.
Dancing fingers take positions
In one of our many crystal clear.

***

Two choices both shown in the mirror
Too familiar and not enough fruit.
Caterpillar lies are spread on toast
And the continents are in recruit.

***

So watch your back you sarsaparilla shooter,
Because the Polar Bellz are watching now.

Ukraine

In this sea of black and grey,

I stand out like golden frizz.

Only if you catch me smile,

Do I shine my champagne-fizz.

These charcoal, smokey, granit waves,

Are rocking me to slumber now.

This little speck of flaxen frizz,

Finds comfort in the dingey bow.

Your fragile heart and one-track-mind,

Would get crumbled, broken, see?

By my new friend, this Thunderic Ocean,

Who I now love, at ashen sea.

In this sea of black and grey,

I stand out like golden frizz.

Only if you catch me smile,

Do I shine my champagne-fizz.

A stoic gang of hard-edged statues,

Make up my new lovely crew.

I grip on close to obstinate rock,

That has an ancient, worn tattoo.

Survival, the one word on your mind,

In capital letters and grey,

I see your fair-candy center,

You still are who you are today.

In this sea of black and grey,

I stand out like golden frizz.

Only if you catch me smile,

Do I shine my champagne-fizz.

Acorns

Sailing alone through this dark abyss; you're the one thing on my mind.

These stinging stars once burned so clearly but now our tears will make us blind.

Shooting stars are angels from heaven, falling like acorns on blood stained snow.

You felt so real and smelled like forever, I can't believe I'm letting you go.

If loose lips sink ships, then tortured tongues bury cities. 

I swear I'll find your hand through this ruble and I'll never let you go.